One huge Deja vu [sorta]

Recalling the moments I had with Marios during the five day Freshmen Orientation Camp, I cant help but wonder my own experiences during poly days. Days prior to the first day of school in NYP, I had undergone a similar FOC as the class of 0402. We were champion class as well and it was highly unexpected.

We were so bonded after that and  even during our 3 years together as a class. I cant help it but wonder the same thing that has happened to Marios, the group that was crowned champions in the recent FOC. I was lucky to be tagged to that group as a photographer. I volunteered my services at the very last minute and managed to get into the gig.  I was even more lucky that i was tagged to Marios and Jamie was the GL for that group. After witnessing their transformation, i couldnt help but feel a sense of Deja Vu. The same thing that I had experienced in poly was reliving itself again and as an observer, it felt truly weird at first.

I got the call that I was able to attend the FOC as a photographer 2 days before the actual event. I understood that alot of preparation were done months prior to the event and I felt kinda guilty that I wasnt part of the preparation team before the event started. Afterall, with the help of my friend, he referred to me to the person who is in charge of publicity. So my entry to the event was sudden and there werent any chemistry between me and the team of photographers. In other words, I was an outsider, an external. So the call to be in was sudden. I nearly backed out because I wasnt given enough time to prepare. But then I told myself; if I am accepted, that surely would mean that they trust me in my skills and would want my services because afterall, they were short on people in the photography department. It was an offer I just couldnt back out from, since I willingly emailed the person and had the expressed written desire to help out in the FOC. To back out was just plain rude.

So I was tagged to Marios and 5 days later, we became like one big family. I truly appreciate for what they have done to me, and also on a deeper level that they may not understand yet. Not only they have accepted me as part of the family, even when I was just a mere photographer, but they gave me an opportunity to actually reflect on my actions this past few years and given me  a chance to have a glimpse of my own experiences back then, when I would surely have forgotten about it entirely. My “Golden Age” is gone and I realized that I’m still clinging onto the hope that this Golden Age could still be relived.  Not only has Marios released me from that nostalgia, but also allowed me to cherished those moments I had with my poly classmates while at the same time looking forward to meeting new people and making new friends. So in the end, I will never forget them, but at the same time, be forward looking. I guess my shackles are finally starting to disappear and I can look forward to a brand new day, a brand new chapter in my life.

For too long, i have bookmarked my previous chapter in my life, hoping to reread that part, knowing that it is already over, and not being able to continue on to a new page. For too long, I have compared my present to that of my past and because of that, I can’t see my future. Thank you Marios.